Today (could be yesterday, could be last month, could be last year but hoping it is not tomorrow or the day after) I am at that juncture in life, from where I see too many roads ahead of me. Some of these might meet at the other end of the spectrum. Some of these are well-defined and clear while the rest look like they lead beyond the clouds - I can't really see clearly what lies ahead. Frankly, I don't even know what I am hoping to find behind those mysterious clouds. I am not confused as to what to choose, even worse, I don't know what I want. I don't have a list of options. I don't know why at times I just go blank. I don't know why one moment I am the shoulder somebody leans on and unburdens himself and the other moment I am so lost that I don't realize somebody calling out to me.There is no reason for the vacuum. There is no reason for the disconnect. It feels like I don't belong to this universe anymore. The other minute I am back to normalcy - a word that I have never been able to define but pretend to comprehend. Back to the roads - yes, the ones that are mysteriously laid to hold the secret of what lies ahead for I do not care about the ones that are well-defined as I know that those are not the ones I want to go down. Thank God for that bit of clarity! The other roads leading to an alternative career, a change in relationship status, doing something for a cause close to the heart are the ones that are hazy right now. Is it time yet to start walking these roads? Do I need to buy more time to decide what I expect out of life before complicating it further? Is everything time bound in life? What are these invisible chains that hold me down? So many questions but no answers. I am still looking for answers!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment